1. Does your dog know the spelling, Latin root, and French translation of the word "walk", yet is unable to grasp the meaning of "come"?

2. Does your dog immediately leap on a cat, bunny rabbit, or child upon hearing the words "Don't worry he LOVES cats (bunny rabbits, children)"?

3. Is your dog shameless? graceless? without dignity? way too in touch with his inner puppy?

4. Does he wake you up in the middle of the night to warn you of the dangers of a kitchen chair, then sleep through the theft of all your valuable possessions?

5. Does he develop a tragic and profound deafness at the sound of "it's time to go home," yet possess bionic hearing at the sound of a can opener?

If you answered "yes" to most of these questions . . .

Relax, your dog is NORMAL!